Monday, August 30, 2010

Dislike Water for chocolate


So, I have been doing a lot of driving since I returned home. In the last month I have traveled to my fathers which is 5 hours north (one way) then I have to go another hour and a half (one way) to pick my kids up for the weekend. Then I drove down to Indiana to visit my Aunt and Uncle. Oh yeah 3 hours (one way). Needless to say I have had a lot of time in my own head. It’s a scary place in there. I wonder about some things like who created YOO HOO? I mean what is up with that? Some dude ran out of milk and said oh well lets mix chocolate syrup with water. Then this genius thinks this actually tastes good enough to market…I mean have you ever tasted that stuff? Then you would expect the business man to throw him out of the office and call him a retard or something else colorful. But NOOO this guy looks at the inventor and says by god I think you have something here. I am only 33 years old and I am sure my parents generation remember YOO HOO. It has been around quite a while this shit has been around since 1926. Which tells me that it was created around the great depression. Not after the depression started either. So there really isn't any excuse for this vile substance. Okay, after the depression they had to make due I get that. But, why the hell is it still here? I remember hanging out at a convenience store in Chicago when I was kid this guy we all called Uncle George was related to my step father and we would go there so Gary (step Dad) would help him with the books. So to keep me busy they would give me YOO HOO and some candy and I could sit in the back watching Star Wars on WGN in the middle of the day on Sunday. Wow I can’t believe I remember all of that. Anyways I remember taking a drink and having a perplexed look on my face. Now I was around 5 or 6 or something so I am sure my thoughts were more innocent. But I can imagine based on my memory that my thoughts went kind of like this- What the fuck is this shit? Is that chocolate water? Where is the milk? Where is the bunny? This sucks. As you can guess I don’t partake in Crazy YOO HOO parties on weekends. So, since we are going through an economic crisis I think someone should create something as stupid as YOO HOO as an homage to a difficult time. I like the idea of a watered down tiramisu drink. We can call it TIRA MOO. So people think oh it’s got milk but HA HA the joke is on them.

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